Hi everyone. This is Sylvias daughter posting on a Sunday, just like my mom typically did. I am sure some of you are wondering, what happened to the weekly musings from the brain of Sylvia White, and after some deep mourning, and thought and the unbearable thought of existing on a planet without my best friend cheering me on, I want to tell you, that on November 19, my mother passed away. I still cannot believe I am uttering these words- it has been the most devastating loss to so many- but mostly, to me. I am an only child, and my mother was my hero. As I became an adult, our relationship like many, shifted into more of a friendship and when I became a mother, she blossomed into the most incredible “mima,” (her chosen grandmother name).
My mother was one in a million- I know I don’t have to tell you that. A creative, brilliant, loving, loyal, rebellious QueenBee who paved the way for so many artists, gallerists and curators professionally—- but personally, gave me through her defiance to be subservient, the framework to be the woman, mother, friend, career woman I am today. It is her, and her ALONE that championed me from the front row of any life event and I am still trying to navigate what life looks like without that loud “WOOOOO WOOOO GO GIRL GO!”
My mom was finally relaxed in her new home in SMA. After 75 years of hustle, she would call me on facetime, from the roof of her KILLER villa in Mexico, and we would giggle at how horrible her Spanish was while gazing at the sunset. She would call me after a long day of navigating the cobblestone streets, and tell me just how much she LOVED living abroad. She hosted a FANTASTIC opening in her new space, just one day before she died. As a matter of fact, the blog post below, was written (and never posted) just hours before her death.
I don’t want to share details, but she passed in her sleep, as I’m told, peacefully- and she was not afraid to die. She was so proud of the life she had paved for herself (so was I!)
And let me tell you, that I know she is with me.
She would sing to me, growing up, every night, “You’ve got a friend” by James Taylor. Shortly after her passing, I had the chorus of this song tattooed on my rib cage as an homage to her. And would you believe that at dinner that night, a live performer got on stage and OPENED WITH THAT SONG? My mommy is here.
I could go ON AND ON about my mom. And I think I will. So if you’re already here, let me know if that would be ok. I have so much to share with the world about the Sylvia that I knew.
But for now, read a bit more, her last musings.
“I’ve never really thought of myself as a writer…sure, I’ve written over 40 ArtAdvice articles for artists over the course of my 40 year career as an art advisor, but those were mainly “how-to” articles doing one of the things I do best…being bossy. (LOL) I started this blog at the suggestion of my daughter (shout out to daughters everywhere that are smarter than their moms) who came up with the idea of revisiting all my old articles with a contemporary commentary. Once I started, it became obvious to me that writing was fun and I loved sharing my thoughts and experiences. With one article per week “dropping,” it didn’t take long before I ran out of my old ArtAdvice articles and this blog morphed into sharing my thoughts about aging, moving out of the country and random tidbits, thoughts and opinions. What I wasn’t able to predict was the positive response I got from friends and strangers, and how great it made me feel. Encouraged and supported (not to mention shocked!) by all the “likes” and subscriptions, my writing was fueled by your buoyed responses, so before I go on the this week’s post… Thank you!
One of the things I love most about living in San Miguel is the beauty of the cobblestone streets. San Miguel de Allende is a Unesco City meaning everything must be preserved to historical standards. New construction is barely distinguishable from the historic structures built in the 18th Century. Around every corner, one street is more beautiful than the next…eye candy for an artistic person such as myself and the reason why the city is filled with artists and galleries. However, after being gone for over 3 months dealing with my health issues in California, I forgot about the nickname of the city…”CITY OF THE FALLEN WOMAN.” San Miguel was given this nickname for a very good reason. It is almost a perfunctory ritual that all women new to San Miguel WILL fall and trip on the cobblestones, uneven sidewalks, unexpected steps..opps, didn’t see that curb, and random bits of broken concrete lying around. So on my first day back while walking to greet a friend for lunch, I forgot about the “Golden Rule”…ALWAYS look down while walking. As if falling wouldn’t have been humiliating enough, I reached for the closest thing to break my fall, which was a stranger’s rear view mirror, and it came down with me…$4500 pesos (to reimburse the kind person for his mirror) and two sprained ankles later, I was finally reunited with my beloved city…I was home.
There is a legend that San Miguel de Allende, was built on a large bed of rose quartz crystals. Rose quartz is said to symbolize unconditional love and infinite peace, and is sometimes called the "heart stone.” Many of us who have moved here have had the same exact story…we came for a visit and were so drawn in by the overwhelming feelings of peace and joy, we never wanted leave. For those of us fortunate enough to be able to make that a reality, we feel blessed. San Miguel has often been named the"Best City in the World.”
It is hard to live in a city where walking is “de rigueur” with two sprained ankles…it is also hard to keep this left handed, won’t take no for an answer girl down…so shortly after falling I noticed one of my calves starting to swell. I texted my doctor at 5am (shout out to Dr. Grace Lim) and by 7am she texted me back with an appointment time for that same day. Dr Lim is a tiny, gorgeous young woman with brains to spare. She immediately ordered a EKG, blood tests and ultra sound of my leg…nervous about how I was going to navigate all these tests in a city where I still don’t speak the language (okay, I’m really trying, but give me a break, at 75 I have lost most of my retention brain cells…*advice to you youngin’s reading this…learn a foreign language before your turn 40!) While inquiring about how and where I was to get these tests done in a timely manner, she smiled and said, “This is Mexico, things are easy here..they will be at your house at 5pm.” Sure enough, right on time the technicians showed up with all their gear to give me an ultrasound, EKG and take blood work in the comfort of my own home! Sure, I had to pay out of pocket instead of it being covered by insurance…but TOTAL cost, including Dr. Lim’s $75 office visit was just under $500…a price well worth it in my opinion especially after experiencing the Kaiser nightmare of jumping through hoops for three months to get appointments, tests, referrals or phone calls with my primary care physician. “
(You can, and I WOULD LOVE YOU TO, respond to this blog/email on the app or via email and it will come to me. It’s healing for me, to also hear, how much YOU loved my mom) xoxo